i tend to over think things or not think anymore. i think im old and tired cant be bothered. tomorrow is the citibank interview and from what i heard from my friend there are politics inside there and its bitchy… but well lets hope all is ok and that i escape the bitches… never really knew how to combat the bitchiness of girls. alot of my friends calls me a bitch.. but i dont think i am one. being a bitch means not caring about anyone and doing anything you want to get to your goal. i can ignore everything for someone and i dont ever wanna be evil to people. maybe its my face.. and if its my face IM DEAD! sigh! this is the reason why i dont really like to meet secondary school friends whom im not close to. they know the childish useless stupid me and not the grown up smarter and nicer me. i dont want uni to repeat itself i cared to much and it was dreadful to be gossiped/forgotten about. i love people and want them to love me back but sometimes some of them never do love back, i know i should never dwell on such issues but i always wonder if its me, if the problem is me. just like being rejected by the Mxx hotel job, is it me? am i lacking? do people really hate me? am i that unlikeable? am i not even qualified?
but i do care. so lets leave it as such. tomorrow will be D day… lets see if i can get a job! like finally.
you only understand how to live when ur forced into a corner and gasping for air!
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